Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
