i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
time to smoke my breakfast
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
