Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize