Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
