I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
