Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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