I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
