Do you still have your period?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
