How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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