and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
