grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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