didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
