dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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