I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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