Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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