ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I think your dad took our porno
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
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