i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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