Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I need moral support for this bender
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
