Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
