Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
