Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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