how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Randomize
