the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
