wrigley field is MILF paradise
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
