In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
