if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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