are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
