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just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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