she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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