Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
