Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Panties = found
Randomize
