Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
