you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize