I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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