I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
