i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
