Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
NoShamevember. You game?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
