Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
