i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
