so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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