what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
