finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
