I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Even the bartender felt bad for me
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
So apparently I’m into choking now
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