Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize