Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(518): View more from New York

my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...

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(310): View more from California

He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at

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(816): View more from Missouri

TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department

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(302): View more from Delaware

you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...

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