why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
