Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
