love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
