Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
