i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
