WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I AM VODKA MAN
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
