Nicole vs. Life
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
