Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
